Sniff, Sniff, Sniffffffffffffffffff!!!
As we drove down the narrow path to the boat launch and I saw the water rippling before us, I thought "finally, I'm going fishing!" I had looked forward to this trip for eternity it seems and now I was finally here.
Scott, my guide and mentor, appears to be an expert fisherman and although all I've heard so far is talk; I'm certain that he'll make my trip worthwhile.
After unloading the boat and making sure all of our fishing gear was stowed, Scott began to wander back and forth on the beach and every few seconds he would raise his head and take in huge sniffs of air from the lake. Well, this got my attention so, like an idiot, I asked "what are you doing Scott?" And Scott calmly replied, "smelling the lake to see where the fish are."
"Holy cow" I thought as I watched this fishbrain walk back and forth smelling the lake "I got me a guide from the bughouse." I didn't know whether to laugh or cry. "Smelling the fish?" I asked. "Certainly" replied Scott "Its the only way to find the big ones" he said as he began to edge farther along the beach. "There" he pointed "there's where we'll go" he said as his finger pointed out over the water to some spot his mind had conjured up I assume.
Well, I thought "This guy is definitely nuts but water is water and fish live in it so why not go there I suppose."
Off we went, motor roaring, heading into the unknown. And, judging from this man's actions, I was quite mindful that I may never return again. All of a sudden in the middle of nowhere Scott stops the boat and makes his way past me to the bow and again he takes in big sniffs of air.
"That way" he says, and off we go again, heading straight towards a lonely island. Stopping just short of crashing on the shore, and scaring the hell out of me, Scott reaches into the water, gets his fingers wet, and sniffs away at his hand. "Around the other side of the island and about 150 yards out is where the big ones are hiding" he says. "Sure" I thought "sure they are you looney tune" "I want to go home" I thought to myself!
Slowly Scott manouvers us around the island and pointing to some imaginary spot on the water, he says "We'll go past them and drift back." "Sure" I thought "why not? This guy has drifted way too far from the nuthouse already anyway." "Whats a few more feet?"
The water is crashing into the boat with three foot tidal waves when all of a sudden Scott says "Drop the anchor." "Ok" I thought "why not? I'm getting old anyway, might as well drown listening to this fish sniffing nut. At least I'll have got my line in the water."
Bending over and sniffing the water again, Scott says "hook up a minnow and cast over there, about thirty feet or so." "What the hell. Why not?" I thought as I winged my line singing through the air, landing within reason of the spot he had selected. Thinking sadly of how I would miss living I slowly jigged in my minnow, when all of a sudden, wham, a fish hit my bait. A big fish!! I set the hook and Scott was yelling "set the drag" Oh ya, "the drag" I thought as I loosened it off. "Get your rod tip up" was the next scream. "Holy cow" I thought "If I don't land this fish that guy's going to kill me." Slowly and surely, with the fine tuned motions of an overweight ballet dancer, and with the guiding screams of nutball Scott, I brough the fish to the surface and in one swift motion he netted it, A 29 inch Walleye!!
The waves were crashing and the boat was rocking, and Scott was muttering some obscenities under his breath. But who cares!!
"Scott" I said, "Stick your head way under the water and see if you can smell a bigger one for me!! You're the best damned fish smeller I ever met!!!"